No deal is better than a bad deal

That's what the book's author "Never split a difference" says in his book. When you want something, there is some way to ask for it; some tricks to use against the brain. That's what this book is about.

When I read the prelude, I was like: All right, let's learn a few tricks to negotiate, like approaching your boss to talk about your salary or approaching a car seller to get a better price than suggested on-site.

But then, as I read, I discover this book is A LOT MORE than that. It's more of a psychology book but really light to read. You will learn how to hack the human brain et not only hack but learn how to ask and listen, which are the more important aspects of negotiation. Here are my favorite tips I learned.

Photo by Florian Schmetz / Unsplash
  1. No is better than Yes, especially at the beginning of a negotiation. If you get your counterpart to say No, it lets them feel they have control of the situation. So you have to make them say 'No' at the beginning of a negotiation.  Here is a good example he gives in the book. Instead of saying: "Is it a good time for you to talk?", we should say: "Is now a bad time to talk?" Then if it's a good time, they will say "No" and be more focused on what you have to say. If it's not, you can ask to reschedule. If they don't want it, you won't get anything anyway, so just let them go.
  2. Calibrated questions. We should use open questions using "How" and "What"; to make the counterpart solve your problems. The sentence he probably uses the most in his book is "How Am I supposed to do that." That sentence is good because it tells the opponent: "Hey, you gave me something to do or want to ask me something. Explain to me how I'm supposed to accomplish that." The other person will then have to think to solve the problem they give you and switch from emotional to rational thinking. Sometimes they will realize what they are asking for makes almost no sense. Sometimes they will reconsider their requests.

There are a lot of other important aspects of the negotiation, but I wanted to keep this article short, so those were the two I thought were the most simple and useful. This book is full of surprises; it's a goldmine of information for anyone because there is negotiation everywhere. Let me know if you enjoy this book and good negotiation!